it's been a 'dose 'em with benadryl' kind of day

This is from Nov. 2007

okay, my day started out fun enough;  if you think that fixing 3 different breakfasts ('because, mama, i just want grits now.  i don't want that other stuff that i wanted before now that you just fixed it.  i like grits now.) is fun.   he got grits.  my coffee wasn't even done brewing yet so  how do you expect me to argue with that?  i was still asleep.
ok, breakfast was done and cleaned up (thank you, lucy, for your help licking the yogurt off of the floor.... it makes my job so much easier. now if you would quit sneaking cat turds out of the litter box and leaving them on the carpet that would be great.)  then it was time to get dressed.....
it used to be so much fun to dress ruby.  i loved having a little girly girl to girly-up!  it pretty much quit being fun the day she stripped down to her diaper (yes, DIAPER-- at this rate of progress she'll be in one when she gets her license) and stood in front of her open closet and down right sobbed..... not because she didn't have anything to wear (which i sometimes still do at 31) but because she didn't have anything that she WANTED to wear.  poor eric kept taking out dresses, tops, pants, tutus, etc. and saying 'how about this sweetie?' or 'here, baby girl, you look so pretty in this!'  to which ruby replied with a snotty and hysterical "NOOOOOOO!"  it was ugly.  she is going to be fifteen in 12 years, 7 months, and 15 days.  i can't wait.
ok, so everyone is dressed and ready to go.  i hurried to take mama to her appointment, ran through the bank, got daddy to go with me to pick my van up from the mechanic, hurried back to mama's to change car seats etc. from her car to my van and by this time every little person i own is chanting their hungry cry.  ruby's sounds like this:  "dumpin'  EAT! dumpin' EAT!" it starts out in a normal (but whiny) voice and then the 'EAT' part is loud and then she always ends it with a grunt and, if we happen to be in the car, a kick to my seat.  sam's isn't loud so much as it is exhausting: "hey mom, i'm hungry....... hey mom, i'm hungry....... hey mom, i'm hungry."  really, i got it the first 12 times.  did you hear the first 12 times i said "I'M WORKING ON IT!" when it's time to eat, you'll be the third to know.
so, we came home and wolfed down some grilled cheese sandwiches, walked the lucy, got dressed AGAIN (because SOMEONE doesn't like it when crumbs get on her shirt.  and it wasn't pink anyway.) and hurried out of here to get to our home school co-op.  it takes about 15 minutes to get there and we made it about two minutes before classes start when sam said 'oh no, mom!  you left my guitar sitting on the bench outside at the house!'  and i did.  in the 'mobile home village.'  so we hauled ass back home to get the thankfully-not-stolen guitar and then went right back to co-op.  whew!  made it!  i thought things were going well until, about an hour into co-op, another mom came to tell me that eli was in the bathroom crying and wouldn't come out.  oh no.  i went in there to find him sobbing in a locked stall, pants soaked.  but his underwear were bone-dry.  how could that be, you ask?  BECAUSE SOME OTHER KID PEED ON MY KID!!!  yes! i mean the boy PEED ON MY KID!  eli was devastated.  i took the peed-on pants and went to find the mama of the pee-er and an extra pair of pants, size 5.  ok, so i found the mama.  and i have to say that i wasn't mad....... until i talked to her.  i mean, kids are kids and do really strange and inexplicable things sometimes.   if you have kids, you know exactly what i mean.  but when i told the mama (who, by the way, has 9 children so i figured she's pretty 'together'.  i mean, you'd have to be, right?  she grinds her own wheat to make bread, for pete's sake!)  do you know what her response was?  'you know, i think he might be diabetic or something.  he drinks a lot and when he has to go, he has to go.'  WHAT?!?!?!!?  your kid just peed on my kid and you're not getting up out of your freaking chair?  you know, if that had been the other way around (but it wouldn't be because my children are fairly aware of the consequences of such actions) i would have busted somebody's butt and they would have apologized profusely while hand-washing the kid's pants in the bathroom sink.  i mean, come on!  no, she didn't apologize for the kid or go talk to him or anything...... oh well, i've got enough 'fun' raising my 3, i can't raise someone else's 9. 
ok, so i tracked down some silly shorts for eli and got him settled back into music class and went to teach the preschool class.  20 minutes later, it's time for snack.  i'm heading to the fellowship hall with ruby to get her snack when i see sam coming out of the bathroom soaking wet from the waist to his shoes.  can i just say 'WHAT?!?!?!?!?!'  my boy peed his pants.  he was in the other building for guitar lessons and he had to go, so he ran over to the main building, where he had to stand in line and when he finally got up there he couldn't undo his button.  it happens.  bless his heart, he was mortified.  i didn't have a change of clothes for him either, so we left early.  i guess he didn't need that guitar after all.  but can i just point something out here?  at least my kid peed on HIMSELF.
right now it's about 10:30.  all the little people's eyes are closed and my bottle of wine is open.  eric is in myrtle beach living it up playing in the national pool tournament.  he left on saturday and won't be back until friday.  it's a long week already and i miss him.  i was really hoping to get the house clean clean clean before he got back, but i might not be done drinking soon enough to do that.....